BECOMING HASHEM'S SHADCHAN
Chayei Sarah
After the passing of his wife Sarah, Avraham turns his attention to making a Shidduch for his son Yitzchak. Eliezer, Avraham’s faithful servant, is appointed as the Shaliach for this vital mission. Before departing, Avraham blesses Eliezer ישלח מלאכו לפניך - Hashem will send His angel before you to guarantee you success in your Shlichus.
With this assurance, Eliezer acts with total confidence, knowing that his mission has been divinely underwritten. He makes a condition with Hashem for a clear sign by which to identify Yitzchak’s intended. After Rivka fulfills this condition, Eliezer gives her jewelry (which according to the meforshim was the act of Kiddushin) even before asking from which family she comes.
Miraculous success is apparent throughout this episode. Eliezer’s travel is miraculously hastened. Rivka arrives on cue as Eliezer davens. And later; when Besuel plans to obstruct the Shidduch, the Malach kills him so that he will not interfere.
When retelling the sequence of events to Rivka’s family, Eliezer changes some of the details to downplay the miracles. Instead of saying that Avraham had said that the angel would go ahead of him, he says that the angel will go with him. This suggests a lesser level of involvement by the Malach in Eliezer’s mission. Similarly, Eliezer relates that he first enquired about Rivka’s family and only then gave her the jewelry.
The story of the Shidduch between Yitzchak and Rivka is repeated in great detail, prompting Rav Achai to declare יפה שיחתן של עבדי אבות מתורתן של בנים - the conversations of the servants of the Avos are more cherished then the Torah of their descendants. The Torah is so sparing in its use of words, indeed some of the details of the most fundamental Mitzvos are merely alluded to. Yet this story was told and retold in all of its details
Chassidus explains that this is because the marriage between Yitzchak and Rivka is the paradigm for the entire purpose of Torah and encapsulates the Avodah of the Jew in this world:
Rivka, the rose amongst the thorns, represents the sparks of G-dliness trapped in the world of Lavan, the forces which conceal G-dliness. These sparks must be extricated and wedded to Yitzchak, the embodiment of Kedusha. The Neshoma, like Eliezer, comes down into this world as Hashem’s Shaliach to bring about this Shidduch between the world and G-dliness.
Before its descent, the Neshoma is given tremendous powers. Our sages teach that before the soul comes down into this world it is given an oath to be righteous - משביעין אותו. The Frierdike Rebbe explains that the word משביעין can also mean to be to sated. The Neshoma is endowed and filled with G-dly faculties with which to accomplish its mission in a world which is fraught with challenges.
With this awareness, we must firmly believe and know that Hashem has given us the power for guaranteed success. No obstacle can stand in our way of keeping Torah and Mitzvos and transforming the world into a holy place. Any challenge that presents itself is merely illusory.
Like Eliezer, this knowledge, is for our own awareness, to give us confidence and resolve. But when we engage with the ‘outside’ itself, our approach must be logical and natural. Why is this?
The ultimate objective of Creation, and the Neshoma’s task in the world is to create a Dirah betachtonim - to transform our lowly physical world and those who inhabit it into a place which recognizes and radiates G-dliness. This transformation cannot be superimposed. Hashem’s desire is that the world itself should naturally come to the conclusion and recognition of the existence of its Creator and His ongoing supervision.
So, like Eliezer, we have to channel our supernatural strengths through very natural means; to engage and interact with the world on its terms; at work, in school, in the street or wherever we find ourselves.
In marrying the world with G-dliness we know that the ‘Shidduch’ is a done-deal even before the ‘first date’. But as Shadchan, our job is to ensure that the world gives its voluntary consent to a perfect match.
With this assurance, Eliezer acts with total confidence, knowing that his mission has been divinely underwritten. He makes a condition with Hashem for a clear sign by which to identify Yitzchak’s intended. After Rivka fulfills this condition, Eliezer gives her jewelry (which according to the meforshim was the act of Kiddushin) even before asking from which family she comes.
Miraculous success is apparent throughout this episode. Eliezer’s travel is miraculously hastened. Rivka arrives on cue as Eliezer davens. And later; when Besuel plans to obstruct the Shidduch, the Malach kills him so that he will not interfere.
When retelling the sequence of events to Rivka’s family, Eliezer changes some of the details to downplay the miracles. Instead of saying that Avraham had said that the angel would go ahead of him, he says that the angel will go with him. This suggests a lesser level of involvement by the Malach in Eliezer’s mission. Similarly, Eliezer relates that he first enquired about Rivka’s family and only then gave her the jewelry.
The story of the Shidduch between Yitzchak and Rivka is repeated in great detail, prompting Rav Achai to declare יפה שיחתן של עבדי אבות מתורתן של בנים - the conversations of the servants of the Avos are more cherished then the Torah of their descendants. The Torah is so sparing in its use of words, indeed some of the details of the most fundamental Mitzvos are merely alluded to. Yet this story was told and retold in all of its details
Chassidus explains that this is because the marriage between Yitzchak and Rivka is the paradigm for the entire purpose of Torah and encapsulates the Avodah of the Jew in this world:
Rivka, the rose amongst the thorns, represents the sparks of G-dliness trapped in the world of Lavan, the forces which conceal G-dliness. These sparks must be extricated and wedded to Yitzchak, the embodiment of Kedusha. The Neshoma, like Eliezer, comes down into this world as Hashem’s Shaliach to bring about this Shidduch between the world and G-dliness.
Before its descent, the Neshoma is given tremendous powers. Our sages teach that before the soul comes down into this world it is given an oath to be righteous - משביעין אותו. The Frierdike Rebbe explains that the word משביעין can also mean to be to sated. The Neshoma is endowed and filled with G-dly faculties with which to accomplish its mission in a world which is fraught with challenges.
With this awareness, we must firmly believe and know that Hashem has given us the power for guaranteed success. No obstacle can stand in our way of keeping Torah and Mitzvos and transforming the world into a holy place. Any challenge that presents itself is merely illusory.
Like Eliezer, this knowledge, is for our own awareness, to give us confidence and resolve. But when we engage with the ‘outside’ itself, our approach must be logical and natural. Why is this?
The ultimate objective of Creation, and the Neshoma’s task in the world is to create a Dirah betachtonim - to transform our lowly physical world and those who inhabit it into a place which recognizes and radiates G-dliness. This transformation cannot be superimposed. Hashem’s desire is that the world itself should naturally come to the conclusion and recognition of the existence of its Creator and His ongoing supervision.
So, like Eliezer, we have to channel our supernatural strengths through very natural means; to engage and interact with the world on its terms; at work, in school, in the street or wherever we find ourselves.
In marrying the world with G-dliness we know that the ‘Shidduch’ is a done-deal even before the ‘first date’. But as Shadchan, our job is to ensure that the world gives its voluntary consent to a perfect match.